Thursday, January 21, 2016

a weighty situation

In life there are no problems, only situations and every situation has a solution. This is Rosies mantra in life, she heard it many many times when we were down in Jamaica for the first time and has never forgotten it.

I am experiencing a situation at the moment with the school board. I received a letter on Monday regarding Rosie. The Florida Health Department randomly tests  the kids for various things and Rosie just failed, miserably, the height and weight test. Actually she did very well in her height but she is a scrawny little pickle and I recieved a note telling me such. (cos God forbid, I have never noticed this myself)

Now I am not one to stand about and do nothing and since everysinglethingIhaveevertried, to make her gain even an ounce, has been in vain, I have a fool proof plan. I have been trying since day one when we knew we had to get her fattened up for heart surgery and lack of doing so would cause her to have an invasive open chest cavity surgery whereas she could have a non invasive, via an artery in the groin, if she would only gain 5lbs, surgery. She gained 8 freaking ounces in 6 months. People the girls does not gain weight.

YES, SHE DOES EAT.  She loves fruit, she loves veggies. She hates sauce of any kind. She loves her food plain. She loves her food dry. She loves apples and strawberries.


While we were in England Jeanne fed her, she liked some of it, when we returned I instantly started cooking the things here, she is eating those 2 things. Those things are not particularly fattening.

So what is my plan?

I'm going to get her to start smoking!

Then I am going to make her quit.  Everyone that packs up smoking gains weight.....all sorts of weight!

Think of the letters I'll get then!

Every situation has a solution. Situation solved.

Don't call 911 or the school board, I'm joking.

I did call the school nurse, I pointed out that she is Asian and that they need to use an Asian chart, she has never heard of such a thing and said I NEED to take her to a DR. It's a good thing I am not swearing anymore. I asked if they had checked her attendance as she is very healthy, then I remembered she actually got sick this year for the 1st time in 3 years and wished I hadn't said that.

Fuey. I wonder if I can ask to be excluded from any further random testing. My kiddies get great healthcare. I'm kinda freaky with that stuff.

Some kids are abused and neglected and i see the need for these tests and observations but can we be sensible with them, please.

I'm going to jump off of my New Years resoloution wagon for a moment,         &*^#$

1 comment:

  1. OMG! What's wrong with those people. Rosie is actually bigger than LiLi who hovers around 44lbs & is not as tall.......they would really go off the wall with her! She is the same way & loves the same food as Rosie with the exception she does eat sauce. When given a choice of candy or an apple takes the apple 99 percent of the time. They both will always "petite" but powerful!

    BTW Loved your solution of making her take up smoking....snort!